The Weigh-in Misshap

(Note: For my creative nonfiction piece, I'm writing about weight loss, being a Weight Watchers member, and the journey to my goals--which makes this entry relevant to class)

Yesterday marked the five month anniversary that Dad and I stepped on the Weight Watchers' scale for the first time. And something still isn't clicking in my head. I've lost 43 pounds, haven't felt this good in a long time, and yet, last Sunday at Knoebels Park, I downed half a funnel cake without thinking twice. Why? How can I not want to lose, and have the mindset to lose, more? Especially after losing 43 pounds!

Dad hasn't gone off program ONCE in five months. Once. And today, he lost his 70th pound. That says everything about what works when losing weight, and what doesn't.

Long story short, I need to get back on track. After not weighing in for two weeks, I gained .8 pounds today. And although I shouldn't beat myself up for it, there are no excuses. I want to change my life, I want to get healthy, I want to have self-esteem that's higher than that of a toothpick. What am I waiting for? Am I scared? I don't know what's wrong with me.

"Everyone has setbacks, everyone has bad weeks...well, except for me," Dad chuckled, as he tried to make me feel better. Thank god he's doing this with me, I don't know if I'd even be at 43 pounds if I was doing this alone. It's just so hard sometimes; I just have to focus on the bigger picture.

For some people, food is just a means of survival; they eat because they have to. For others, food can be addicting, a way to deal with emotions and depression, a comfort that always satisfies temporarily. I'm willing to admit that yes, I'm addicted to food. But I'm working on it, and I took the first steps to change my life around. I want to change; no one can want it for me or do it for me.

Ironically, as I type this, a Weight Watchers commercial just came on the screen, showing a college-aged girl that lost 73 pounds; this was directly followed by a Red Robin advertisement, showing off the latest of their "juicy, delicious burger."

Do I even need to comment on this?